happy

I did something unimaginable today.

It's something that I never thought I'll ever get down to doing. But I did it and it feels... amazing. 

You see, I met someone special. I don't know how he managed to get into my life but I'm glad he did. He brings me so much joy and well, I hope it's mutual. The thing is... we're kinda at the stage now where like, we're gonna be together (it's more about when, as of now) assuming everything goes fine hehe. And so I was just thinking about how I definitely don't wanna bring over any of my past emotional baggage. 

It's only fair to him, and more importantly fair to myself. 

Why should I let the past tangle itself with my present (and very possibly my future)?

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I've wanted to delete the pictures off my phone for awhile now.. but I never really got down to doing it. I guess it was partially cause I couldn't bring myself to, 

and partially cause I never actually had a reason to?

But now I do :-) This special someone makes me feel SO loved (amongst the many other things he makes me feel hahaha). I find myself not wanting any bit of the past anymore. Not a single bit. This is actually quite a feat because honestly ever since my break up i've met guys here and there... but none really "made it" haha. After my break up, I couldn't picture myself with anyone. Even if I did.. I would expect myself to constantly think of what I used to have. I also found myself looking for my ex in the guys I met. It was such a horrible feeling, a vicious cycle.

Meeting this special person.. I feel like I've never wanted anything more. 

It's like I don't want my past anymore. With each passing day, it just makes me feel more certain about leaving the past behind (where it should be), and also about not wanting to see a future without this person. & I'm someone who's rarely ever certain about anything. 

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I feel so cheesy rn typing all of this HAHAHA
Typing this post with a massive sore throat and coughing my lungs out but ahhh :')

I'm so happy