that's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt.

I remember feeling really excited yet slightly bummed out about knowing that The Fault In Our Stars (TFIOS) would be released on the 6th of June, cause really wanted to watch it but I felt like I didn't have anyone to watch it with?? I tried my luck and told Bryan something along like "eh if you no date till then and plans to watch it shall we watch together" and yay he agreed. We have always been movie buddies somehow HAHA like we always end up watching movies together?!?!?

So anyway we arranged to watch TFIOS today!!!! our friendship is completely platonic btw haha just saying, I know it might be (a bit) hard to believe but we are L E G I T fwens

I.. was.. late. as usual haha but thank God we've been friends for so long, he knows me all too well and wasn't (too) mad HAHAHAHA thank u boredbryan

Walked into Payless and we both agreed this pair of shuz fit him pretty well but... no moolah no shuz.

Bought gongcha and headed for the movie after. 

The movie was really simple. and I feel like to really appreciate and love this movie you must love it's script. I really love the use of words in this movie. The amount of quotes you can get from this movie is amazing haha.

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Honestly I won't talk about what the movie is about and all cause that's something you can google and I don't think I will do the movie justice trying to review it? haha idk just feel that I'm not very good at that. I just felt like the movie brought out and reminded me of past and present emotions within me. One of the only things I had in mind throughout the show was my past relationship (with Shawn), and the only person I felt like I really wanted to talk to about the show was him. It's probably quite normal i guess? since the parallels at certain parts to him/our r/s before was really apparent and well idk. Maybe in a few years time when we become friends again.

There are certain parts of the movie that got to me more than the others. The part where by her mother/father told her, "you were really lucky to have loved him right?" or smth like that. 

 also the part where they talked about infinities. Although my past relationship ended, I am still very thankful to him for our small infinity. Not everyone will get to expeience something we had you know? and I'm just thankful to have even experienced it at all.

You don't have much say about getting hurt but you do have some say in choosing who hurts you. And well, I don't wanna be play the victim here but,

 I definitely got hurt pretty badly but truth be told so did he.

I like my choices. I hope he likes his.

I have so much more I could and would probably say but well my mind just gets very tired every time I think about things relevant to my past relationship. I guess I know myself that there isn't much value in doing so and I don't do myself good. It's like an instinct actually, haha.

One thing's for sure, I've definitely grown to be a tad bit more cynical. Don't know if that's a good or bad thing but I choose for it to be a good thing :-)

put the killing thing right between your teeth, 

but you don't give it the power to do its killing.

"that's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."